Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Lunch today was supposed to have been quick, to the point-and uneventful. H & R Block gave me a quick call this morning while at work and I happily woke hubby up telling him I was picking him up for lunch so we could go sign our tax forms. After grumbling a bit, Jose decided it was in his best interest to come with me at lunchtime to do this-rather than facing the wrath of a bitchy wife later on.

It was busy at the tax office, but I was glad we only were in there 15 minutes waiting. It seems everyone wants to pop in at lunchtime to sign their forms. (note to self: adjust your lunch hour temporarily during tax time next year so it is NOT between the hours of 11-2!) With tummies rumbling, we decided we'd get an order from Burger King to bring home and then I'd head back to work. Easy, right?

Jose was driving. He has this macho man thing that he cannot be in the car when I am driving. Most likely because I am a cautious driver, don't take risks or give it the gas or do anything remotely resembling a Nascar race. My style is more tour bus, slow, always on the lookout, and sure to reach my final destination-which is in all likelihood not wrapped up around a tree someplace.

The BK drive-thru was packed. The restaurant was busy and there were tons of people inside sitting and eating in full view of the drive thru. As the line of cars began pulling up, I told Jose to pull the car ahead. He hesitated, and then did so. Normally, I would have thought it was strange for him to hesitate, but my mind was working overtime trying to process how I would be spending my Earned Income Credit. So I paid him no attention and began to recite the order into the speaker. We pull up verrry slowly to the first window to pay and as I hand the cashier the card my car starts to act like it is possessed.

My odometer starts going thru the numbers a mile a minute and I am seriously thinking that I have hit some time warp or something. It is just like all those Sci-Fi movies I watch where the plane hits the Bermuda Triangle and you just know the shit is gonna hit the fan. You see a closeup of all the instrument controls going nuts and you pray it will never happen to you. After a minute of surging power, similar to taking its last breath, my car dies. Now mind you, we are sitting in a packed Burger King drive thru window getting ready to go to the next window to pick up our food.

Yes, I let out a few f-bombs. And I said them in front of the cashier, who made it the whole damn restaurant's business to know that my car had just died. Patrons stood up, gawking. Personnel stuck their head thru the other window. A woman in back of me started swearing, giving the term "fast food" a whole new meaning. Jose jumped out of the car and I got into the driver's seat as he started to push. A couple of cars back, another guy waiting in line jumped out as well, and helped to push. If I knew who he was, I would have bought him a Whopper...or a beer or two. :)

I called my coworker (thank you Rhonda!) and asked her to pick up poor hubby. Thankfully she did and he went home and got his car and battery cables and charged me up enough to get home. From there, I waited about a half hour while he got the alternator out in the freezing cold and we brought it to Autozone. Yup, that's what it was. A couple of hundred bucks later, my car is running fine.

Man, was I embarassed by all of this. I swore not to return to Burger King-at least in this century anyways. Jose got me at work with my car and we picked up Deja at afterschool care. She was hungry. Burger King was on the way home. Jose swings in and heads for...you guessed it, the Drive Thru. I am huddled down hiding in my seat, hoping all the lunch personnel have gone home. As we make it to the first window to pay, the manager sees us and says-"Back to try again, huh?"

I could have just about died. Jose laughs and tells him it was the alternator. I keep my mouth shut, mortified. He tries to make me feel better telling me it happens all the time. I think I will be using the other Burger King for awhile...the one WAY across town. As an added note: Jose tells me that the car was acting funny right before it died and it didn't have any juice to make it to the first drive thru window. But he didn't want to tell me that, because he knew I'd freak out. I think I deserved fair warning, dont'cha think? Guess who's in the doghouse tonight?


areyoukiddingme said...

That is hilarious...I'm sorry you were embarassed, but you certainly added some excitement to the Burger King drive-thru. I can't believe your husband went back THE SAME DAY! In THE SAME CAR! You should let him out of the dog house and thank him for providing you with a funny anecdote.

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